Whatever happened to cutting class? When a 13-year-old student at a South Carolina middle school recently got sent to hospital after throwing up and passing out, the principal decided to search his bag, The State reports.

Lo and behold, the kid was packing nine empty mini bottles of Fireball Cinnamon Whisky, which has felled its share of grownups. (All the warning you need lies in Fireball’s debatable slogan, “Tastes like heaven, burns like hell. What happens next is up to you.”) There was plenty more where that came from: our young achiever had also slipped bottles to fellow students.